All the Little Things

Since his passing on Monday, I have known that I would always miss my dad. To me, he was always this big person physically with an even bigger heart and personality. And I thought that I would miss him as a whole, however, I was wrong. It was not the big personality that made him who he was. It was his all of the little things about him that made up that big whole. And now I am starting to realize that it is all the little things that I will miss the most about him.

It s the little things like how he always took mine and mom’s lemons when the server brought them in our drinks after we both had asked for no lemon. The way he could always find a way to make me laugh and calm down when I was angry or upset. The way he would swing a hammer with expert precision, a skill that came from experiencing multiple smashed fingers and thumbs. And the serious look that he would have his face whenever he was thinking about something important.

I will also miss the jokes that we would make about his lack of hair, ok, that was just me making those. I will miss the long talks about football we had that always annoyed mom. The innocent, yet mischievous, look he got on his face when he was planning something ornery. The way he was able to make friends with anyone after speaking to them for just a few moments. The way he could make people laugh at just about anything. And that special smile he had only for me that let me know that he was proud of me.


These are just a few of the things made my dad, the giant of a man that he was. And they are the things that I will miss the least about him. What I will miss the most about him is how, even at the end, he put others before himself. He cared deeply about people, more than he did about himself. That was why he was able to make me laugh when no one else could, and why he could make anyone like him. He wasn’t fake in the way he went about treating people. Everyone had his respect until they proved they didn’t deserve it, and even then, he still treated them with honor and respect. He had a way with people that just made them want to be around him.

I like to think that the way that he acted was the way Christ acted while He was here on this earth, but on a smaller scale. Christ had thousands of people following Him, and that was because He sincerely loved and cared about every one of them. He wasn’t afraid to touch the leper that society had shunned and disowned. He wasn’t afraid to talk with the woman in the heat of the day at the well that was thought of as less than human because she had been married multiple times and was a Samaritan. And He wasn’t afraid to forgive a man who had previously been hurling insults at Him as they both were dying on a cross. It was these Christ-like characteristics that made my dad the amazing man of God that he was. And it is these characteristic that we all will miss the most about my amazingly huge dad, Gary Dow.

Tough questions suck....

Okay, so here's the deal. You guys may or may not know this, but my dad has been back in the hospital since last Wed. He is going to be coming home 2moro, but things are not looking good. The Doctors have said that the cancer has spread to pretty much everywhere in his body and that at this point there isn't anything left that they can do. He is going to be placed under Hospice care when he comes back.

However, despite all this, my dad is still believing that God can heal him and is continuing to fight. He also, in my personal observation, has prepared himself for the worst and is ready to move on if that is what God's will is.

As you all can imagine this is a very tough time for me and my family, and we all have asked ourselves some very tough questions. For me, one of those questions was to myself. It was, "With everything that has happened in the last few months and years, how do I know that God really exists?" And the answer is because of the faith my father has had and still has during all this.

Now, my father is not a stupid man. He is one of the wisest and most intelligent people that I know. He is not one to follow blindly with out just cause and reason. It is because of his logical faith in God that I know God exists, has a plan, and, despite all the bad that has happened in the past few years, is using this situation to His tremendous advantage.

I cannot begin to tell you of the huge number of people, many of which I have no idea who they are, who at church have stopped me to tell me that they are praying for my dad. I have also heard stories about how my dad's faith has encouraged other in their own personal fights with serious illnesses. And God even used this situation to keep me from disaster when I had my appendix removed. But that is a story for another time.

I guess what I am trying to say is this. God exists. Period. End of story. If you don't believe me (which I know all of you do) then come get to know my father, and I mean GET TO KNOW MY FATHER. If you can walk away from my dad, after really getting to know him, and say that God doesn't exist, then let me know, so I can pray extra hard for you.

Now, I want to let you know, I haven't told you everything that is going on right now. Have told you the most important information as it relates to my current status. If you want to know more, then please visit http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/garydow where my mom keeps a more up to date kind of blog about what is going on.

I also want to thank you guys for all of your prayers, and ask that you continue to pray for us during this difficult time. I would also ask that, until I say differently, please do not ask me any specific questions about my dad in person. I have my reasons for asking this, which is mainly about my own personal pride, so if you would do this for me, I would greatly appreciate it.

Thank you guys.